I decided this weekend that I’m going to do my best to recap my weeks lessons so that I will have more thoughts to reread later and understand a bit better where I was at in this crazy BEAUTIFUL journey :) Plus anything in different colors is my thoughts! Enjoy all eight of you :)
Week Three-John Bills-Hearing the voice of God/Father heart of God
To start my speaker this week was John Bills, son in-law of Joy Dawson. He has been in ministry for 37 years and at a young age he prayed the prayer, “I want to commit my life to the destitute of the world” little did he know that he would be walking with people that have or are going through traumatic experiences.
1979- Laos, Thailand
John was staffing a YWAM crossroads DTS and got an application from a young man who was HIV+ instantly he wanted to write him a “nice” rejection letter and be done with it but then he was stop by the holy spirit inside him saying that Christ died for him also. So John made a phone call and asked the young man if it was okay if he disclosed his medical condition to other students in the DTS so they could pray about this young man coming to their DTS. The young mans name was Michael. Michael said that it was fine so John hung up with him and gave the others a call. Almost immediately all the students agreed that Michael was meant to be there and that he should accept him. When John called Michael and told him he was accepted all he heard was silence the slowly he started to hear sobs. John asked Michael if everything was alright and he said, “I’m just so used to rejection that I planned for rejection”
As this story was told tears welled up in the corners of my eyes. Someone is so used to being rejected that they plan for it, it breaks my heart. How did we get so lost along the way that we stopped or never started walking like Christ.
Notes:
Compassion; not feeling sorry for a person, but love beyond what we can love, through the power of Christ.
We want so badly to be in control of our lives that we only give God parts or pieces of it but not all of it.
Seek God first.
Desperate need to know his character.
Although I have ALL of this,
I have struggled with this.
Giving up MY rights.
When things are good God is good, but when something bad happens to us we feel like God is distant. Following this we made Life time line by drawing a ruler on the paper and every millimeter was small things and every inch mark was traumatic events that if they aren’t dealt with then they become buried and later on down the road when something else occurs it triggers those emotions from something that wasn’t dealt with from before causing the current event to seem even more traumatic than it might actually be.
How do I get out?? Im stuck.
Pslams 23:3-4
He renews my strength.
He guides me along right paths,
Bringing honor to his name.
Even when I walk
Through the darkest valley,
I will not be afraid,
For you are close beside me.
Your rod and your staff
Protect and comfort me.
Ways to hear the voice of God:
· Though others
· Spend time alone, with God!
Check your life for hindrances if you aren’t hearing the voice of God
(idolatry, unbelief, love, independence, doubt, pride, substances, fear, comfort, reputation)
· Don’t justify or think you deserve anything.
· Freedom from things by releasing them to God.
1 Samuel 3:1-14, goodness I couldn’t imagine being directly spoken to from God!! Hearing his audible voice!!! Wow I would probably pee my pants!!! So this is all for tonight but ill continue tomorrow :)
