I Was Made For This. . .

Since being in Rwanda I’ve had a hard time writing.

My inspiration seems to be everywhere else but here.

Often times I can write best when I am giving up my rights.

Rights to clean hot water, shelter, food.

But since being here I haven’t had to give any of those up.

We have clean HOT water.

We have been blessed with a beautiful house.

We are living in a country that grows amazing food,

So we are eating so well.

So I have been a rut for getting a new perspective,

Until today. . . .

Today I got my inspiration back,

We have been doing street ministry this week.

Where we go door to door and get to know people,

Learn their stories, and share some of ours.

Hours are spent with these new friends.

We laugh, we pray, we share.

And glory is given to God.

This week has been amazing,

For the first time in seven days

I felt like I was in Africa.

Don’t get me wrong the people,

the moto’s (motorcycles),

the smells, the laughter,

have all been here.

But something has been missing,

it just doesn’t feel like

the Africa I was in six months ago.

I couldn’t put my finger on what it was though.

But it just didn’t feel right here.

Today we spilt our team into two groups,

One team had three people and the other two.

Each had a translator and a leader

Margaret was ours and Pastor Claude was their leader.

We walked opposite directions.

One team up hill,

And we headed down hill.

As we walked down the dirt road,

that was covered in rocks,

used soda pop caps,

and crater like dips,

I found myself anxiously thinking

about what God had in store

for this new day and this beautiful place.

The dips we crossed and walked in

are run off canals from the rainy season.

Which makes it very interesting to watch cars

Attempt to drive these side streets.

As we walk we are surrounded by large gates,

Broken glass aids as a security system

cemented to the tops of the walls surrounding the gates.

Laughter from children fills the air as we walk

But I cant pinpoint exactly where it is coming from.

Every bit of me wants to knock on every gate

until I found where the laughter is coming from.

And play with the children.

As we continued Margaret our leader

asked us which way we felt lead to go

Alysha and I looked both ways,

Immediately I felt lead to the left

but I wanted to see what she would say.

Alysha looked and the pointed to the left also.

As we walked we could see a few men standing and

Some other ladies sitting on the ground preparing food

As we approached some kids came flooding down.

Probably seven or eight kids all around four and five.

As I bent down to their level

another kid spotted me and came running to me,

she was probably four or five,

with wide spread arms,

and a huge grin on her face her little

dirty brown hands

wrapped around my neck,

Instantly peace swept me and I knew that

This is what I was made for.

Those hands, this country, these people.

Kids continued to swarm down the hill

and wrap their arms and legs around us.

As we walked over to sit and share with these people,

The children followed with eyes locked on our every step.

Trying to get as close as possible to lay their little hands on me.

My heart melted.

Its like they can sense my love for them.

And my heart for them.

These hands, these eyes, these smiles fill my spirit.

The Africa that I left six months ago was here all along.

I just needed a change of perspective and to take a different street.

So often in my life I tend to walk the same path, day in and day out, crossing paths with the same people and making the same small talk.

But I don’t believe this is what God is calling me to do.

I think he has bigger paths and different roads for me to walk down.

Ones that might make me uncomfortable at times but in the long run grow me into the person he made me to be and ultimately more like Him.

“He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.”

                                               -John 3:30

We sat with the ladies for a few hours, we shared the experiences we have walked through in our lives and  how we learned to forgive people without them apologizing. And that sometimes our circumstances don’t change but our perspective does and through doing this our life is changed.

While we shared the women and children listened intently and you could really feel them taking it to heart. After we gave them the opportunity to share about themselves and what they had been through. Out of the seven or eight women there only five of them stayed and listened and talked with us the whole time. Mind you, we interrupted their days, we weren’t invited we just showed up. And this is also why I love this culture so much just the willingness to stop what you are doing to build a relationship. So as they went through their stories many of them shared similar things, growing up with no parents, being taken advantage of at a young age, and resulting in multiple children with multiple fathers. Now I want to take a second to say that these women are no different from you and I, they have the same desires as a young girl but the one major difference is that they were born into poverty, in a different country. No choice involved here. I have heard people say that even though they are born into poverty they can choose their future but when you are born into a family where you don’t have running water or food regularly and education costs money, school really gets placed on the back burner if not completely removed from the picture. My heart breaks, why them, why not me? I know God has big plans for these people whom he treasures so much and I’m so thankful that I get to be here with them during this chapter in their lives and mine.

I also believe this is why God gave me Jesse, together we are two hearts chasing after one God and trying to become more compassionate for his world, his people, his eyes, and ultimately his hands. We both are called to ministry and ultimately one day to the mission field. Thank you for your encouragement back home sweetheart it means the world to me that you are becoming the strong leader in our soon to be family (You, Me, and Childers) and I hope to continue becoming your help-meet J

Thank you God for blessing me with the support back home to be able to come here and serve these beautiful people. Thank you for teaching me that stuff means nothing to you. Thank you for showing me joy in the dirtiest places and reminding me that serving others brings a greater joy than anything this world can give. I pray that you would continue to break my heart for what breaks yours and that I will never be to busy to take a new road, pick up a piece of trash, or feed a hungry person.

 (P.S.- Dawn Heres this second one is for you!!! :) )